Confirmed bachelor – Guest Post
I’d met Marty on POF. Nice guy, large vocabulary (so large I’d create a mental list of words to look up), cuter than his picture but shorter than his profile stated (by an inch so I forgave it), also born and raised in the city which he now loathed.
I have a dog, a big dog, with a ton of energy. Most weekends I’m out in the woods doing the best I can to actually tire him out…. He’s five. Typically the first ‘meet’ is going for coffee somewhere or a drink but an alternative I find among dog owners is the nature walk. I got lost on my way to the park. He found out pretty quickly that I’m directionally challenged. It’s funny, every time we met from that day forward he’d always ask:
“Do you know how to get there? Do you want directions?”
I never quite figured out if he was genuinely concerned or just plain mocking me. Probably the latter. We built this twisted friendship thing that I had trouble explaining to myself, let alone friends. Marty was about to be “Over the Hill” and never married, or even engaged. He was always out and about; volunteering in festivals, community standing committees, First Aid certified, busy, busy, busy. Usually when we got together, it was at his place, and we drank. He’d sip whiskey on the rocks and I’d indulge in some red wine, on a few occasions, I’d end up sleeping over. When I made myself available… he wasn’t. When I’d throw in the towel, he’d blow up my phone with texts. It was a classic case of the “he only wants what he can’t have.”
Ladies, have you ever played that game? It’s confusing, kind of tiring and very irritating. I figured out after a few months Marty was in fact a confirmed bachelor.
Here’s how to spot them:
- Never been married/engaged or had a long term relationship (I’m talking something that lasted more than 2 years)
- Refuses to commit or talk about the relationship
- Makes little to no effort to ‘woo’ you
You know what I say to that? NEXT!